dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
