what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
