what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
