I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
