did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize
