I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
pray to the hookup gods
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
