Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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