I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
You're breaking my sexual little heart
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