I wanna bring you to show and tell
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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