I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
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I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
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I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
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