I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
