I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
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You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
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