Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
I'm too high and old for this...
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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