i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
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