hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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