I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Randomize
