is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize