dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Randomize
