That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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