Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(734): View more from Michigan

is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow

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(910): View more from North Carolina

In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of

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(973): View more from New Jersey

no. you can't hotbox the world.

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(813): View more from Florida

i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before

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(505): View more from New Mexico

I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though

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(732): View more from New Jersey

I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.

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(502): View more from Kentucky

got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.

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(614): View more from Ohio

So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...

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(615): View more from Tennessee

we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac

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