the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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