I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
Randomize
