Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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