Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
