4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize