Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Randomize
