what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Randomize
