I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
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