lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
