Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize