OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Naked. naked and bneed help.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
