who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
