office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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