I bet he comes in French.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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