Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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