As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
