Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
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