i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
