no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize
