I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
