Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Randomize
