She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
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