Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Randomize
