I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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