i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Randomize
