chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
My vagina is very pro this idea
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
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