im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
