Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Randomize
