i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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