Have you finally orgasmed yet?
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize