i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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