This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Randomize
